Wednesday, December 10, 2003

 
Please Spam me Some More

I am not sure what CNN’s current infatuation with really wanting to send people e-mails is all about. But you would think that with all those articles they post all of the time relating to people hating SPAM and other negative articles about junk e-mail, that they would have gotten the general idea that people don’t want CRAP filling their e-mail box, any more than they want Telemarketers calling them at Dinner time.

posted by Jason 4:20 PM |

Monday, December 08, 2003

 
You Have Stolen my Manhood!

. . . . And the only way for me to get it back and retain it, is to prevent you from passing me!”

So I went up to Portland this last weekend to visit my little sis. I had a good trip, although as usual Portland was nice and wet the entire time. But it was good to hang out with my sister on her turf, and with her friends.

So, on my way back down here yesterday (It was pouring down rain the entire trip.) I was driving along and had to make a little boy's room pit stop. So I pulled of at a rest stop, and did my business. When I got back into the car and started to get back on the freeway I ended up following another guy who also had the same call of nature. This guy didn’t accelerate at the required rate for someone in front of me in my opinion, so I pulled around him a little before the merging of the lanes was complete.

Well apparently being passed before you are up to speed is a direct attack on your value as a man, so this required immediate action by the driver to re-secure his place among real men. To do so, after properly up to speed, the guy came flying by me at a good 15 Mph more than I. Personally I really don’t understand the problem some men have about being passed, but it just doesn’t bother me.

“Hey if you want to drive faster than I do, and risk the mega-ticket, be my guest.”

But I could tell there was something odd about the way he drove. The next time I came across him I figured out what was amiss. This guy really didn’t feel comfortable driving at that speed in the rain. In fact he didn’t seem to be comfortable driving the speed limit either. But his manhood was at stake, so comfort was apparently disposable for short spurts. I would eventually catch up with the guy again, and he would see me, and floor the accelerator again to ensure I couldn’t pass him, but as soon as he was next to another car, or safely out of my range he would slow back down to an apparent comfortable speed. This played out over almost an hour, of him driving along and me catching up to him, and almost ready to pass, and then he would take off again into the distance. I saw other vehicles pass him on my approach many times, and he seemed OK with that, just not me.

Eventually he got stuck behind a semi-truck due to bad planning going up a mountain and I snuck by him, to which he tried for another mile or so to get back in front of me, and then gave up and returned to his comfort zone, at which point I lost him behind me, to never see him again.

Well this little story got me thinking about why some men seem to think that the way others drive has a direct relation to them in some fashion. I just don’t get it! Why did me passing this guy make him believe he had to pass me back and stay in front of me?

What was he trying to prove, and to whom was he trying to prove it?

The only answer I could come up with is the one in the title of this post.
posted by Jason 3:14 PM |

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

 
Christmas Shopping Day 1

Well I have started the task of picking up presents for all of my family members. Last night I went to the mall and got an amazing number of gifts, and then headed out for some more shopping. Unfortunately this year I don’t have any “Wow” Gifts, or very targeted creative gifts. So I am really just going off of the lists that people gave me.

Although I noticed since I am putting Christmas on the Plastic this year that I have been quicker to settle on a gift. I have walked up and looked over the gift, and decided “Yes I’ll get that for so and so” a whole lot faster than in previous years. I hope this doesn’t mean that the quality of the gifts has gone down at all.

posted by Jason 3:52 PM |

Tuesday, December 02, 2003

 
Old People Walk like they Drive

While standing in line at the bank today (which was way too busy for being a Tuesday), I was stuck behind an old guy who looked to be about 70 or so. When the line in front of him moved, he just stood there and looked around, it wasn’t until he could go up to a teller that he actually moved. So, the whole line started about 20 feet from where the line should have been.

While I stood there many thoughts went through my mind of telling the guy to “move up”, “get out of the way”, or My personal favorite “If you cant obey standard Line Standing Etiquette you should not be standing in Line!”

But fortunately (or unfortunately depending on your stance) I did not tell the guy anything. I just stood there steaming at him quietly.

posted by Jason 1:54 PM |

Monday, December 01, 2003

 
I knew there was a reason I didn't like going to Wal*Mart

Good reason #1

Good reason #2

Good reason #3

posted by Jason 6:39 PM |

 
After 5 Days of Beating my Head into a Brick Wall

Well a few months ago I had a project I was working on, and ran into a stumbling block. I gave up and found a dirty way around the problem at the time, and figured I would get back to it eventually. That was after 4 days of continuous work on the problem with no headway.

Well today was the day I got back on the case, and decided to see what other people in my field might do to resolve the issue, so I posted the question to multiple Programming forums, only to get back the response of

“Sometimes you CAN make a report too complicated.”

What!? That’s total crap, nothing is too complicated. I am pretty sure I can make my monitor dance on its side all by itself given enough time, and proper motivation. I want an answer not a cop-out! Anyway I continued to bang my head into this wall all day, and it finally paid off. I made it through to the other side!

Unfortunately I am very ticked off at the means to the solution. It turns out that Microsoft didn’t program something’s to figure out math on less than 8 point fonts. So the program was calculating total pages needed incorrectly and truncating my information, all cause they didn’t think that someone might use a 6 point font! I wasted 5 whole days because of Microsoft. And what is terrible is that this bug is apparent in Access 97, 2000, 2002(XP) and in the latest version 2003.

posted by Jason 6:04 PM |

Wednesday, November 26, 2003

 
On a Happier Note

Everyone have a Happy Thanksgiving. I may make some updates this weekend but only if something really good pops up.
posted by Jason 4:01 PM |

 
Unbeleivable

CNN.com - 'Master' and 'slave' computer labels unacceptable, officials say - Nov. 26, 2003

How can this be offensive???? It is the definition of the words! How can some people be so idiotic? Either these people are complete bafoons, or they just want to make a name for themselves as PC. This sort of thing pisses me off!
posted by Jason 10:25 AM |

Monday, November 24, 2003

 
Law #65 - Law of Motion vs. Value:

“The Velocity of your vehicle in MPH should never exceed the value of that vehicle in dollars.”

I and a friend wrote this law last year after a road trip to go Skydiving. The reason we came up with this law was on our way to the airport we were just driving along the freeway at a good 75 Mph, when all of a sudden a little white car came flying by at, oh lets say, Mach 7. In the brief millisecond I had to look the vehicle over, and I kid you not, we saw the following sign:

“For Sale - $50 or best offer”

Now if I only valued my car at $50, I am pretty sure the vehicle wouldn’t even start, let alone go above 75. But that is just me. But this person seemed to feel quite comfortable zipping along at mach 7, in a car barely worth the fee to tow it out of the ditch. This seemed a little odd to us, so we started talking about Law #65, and decided it could even be applied to almost any mode of transportation yet known to man.

If you don’t value your bicycle for more than $5 would you feel safe riding it full boar down the side of a mountain, with sharpened spikes and broken glass at the bottom? OK even without the broken glass and spikes, it wouldn’t be advisable.

If your parachute you are strapping to your back isn’t worth $50 should you be jumping out of a plane with it on? Well for that one I have no idea how to value a parachute, so I just trusted the company that provided it, and was helping me out of the plane.

In the end, I highly recommend Skydiving for anyone, do it at least once even just to say you have. Although I would ask what the value of the parachute is before getting in the plane.

posted by Jason 2:47 PM |

 
SHREK 2 -- MAY 21, 2004
posted by Jason 11:16 AM |

 
Leaves

Well I spent my vacation day on Friday raking leaves. And boy, let me tell you, I had a blast. I spent 4 hours raking, and shoveling and in the end filled 15 large bags full of leaves. I was going to go up on my roof and clean out the gutters as well, but after 4 hours I was in no mood to do anything but veg in front on my TVB for pretty much the rest of the day.

Although now that all the leaves are up off the yard, it has allowed my dog to get access to the dirt underneath them. So the last few times he has come in from outside, he has left really nice brown paw prints all over the carpet.

posted by Jason 11:15 AM |

Thursday, November 20, 2003

 
Talk Back!

Hey I just enabled commenting on my Blog!

Thank you to the beautiful young ladies over at Madpony for a great example of commenting done well, and the link to HaloScan the company now doing my comments.
posted by Jason 2:01 PM |

 
Forced to Take Vacation

Well I am being forced into taking vacation. My company has a policy that you can’t have over X number of hours at the end of the year, or you loose them, so I am being forced to cram a week and a half’s vacation sometime between now and the end of the year.

Now normally you would think “Well why didn’t you just take your vacation during the year? Then you wouldn’t have so much racked up now.” Well true, but my job doesn’t exactly have a slow part of the year where I can take those vacations, and my boss has a tendency to tell me no when I want to actually go somewhere. And also I am not a good traveler by myself, and as of yet, I have not found someone that wants to travel with me. So taking a week of vacation and sitting around my house all week is actually rather boring, so I try not to do that.

So Anyway I got off topic, so In order to cram in all of the vacation without giving enough time to my boss to break something while I am gone, I have opted for spreading out the vacation. So Tomorrow I have the day off, and the following 2 Fridays, then I work a Friday, then not, then the 26th through 31st I have off. If Only I had planned something for that time off.

posted by Jason 1:35 PM |

Wednesday, November 19, 2003

 
I have been Restored!

As of today, Google apparently has fixed my search listing, as I now have a Title again. Yeah!
posted by Jason 1:02 PM |

 
Boycott Gillette

Now here is a site that is completely unbiased in its accurate news reporting. Gotta love a site that fully researches their topic before creating an entire movement to stop something they are afraid of.
posted by Jason 11:22 AM |

 
The Plastic Christmas

This year Christmas is going to be a little different, and probably not quite so enjoyable. Due to “Mis-Forcasting” my finances back a couple of months ago I am still behind in a few bills so this year I am going to have to put all of my Christmas shopping on the good old plastic card. Of course knowing that I will be paying interest on these purchases will mean I won’t be quite a generous as I have been in previous years. Which really is too bad, I have enjoyed giving out the best gifts for the last couple of years.

posted by Jason 11:14 AM |

Tuesday, November 18, 2003

 
I Have Been Deleted

Or at least mostly removed.


Over the last few days my number of hits on my site has dropped. So I went investigating, and found that Google has practically removed me from their search engine. I used to show up within the first few pages on certain key words, now I don’t show up till at least the 11th or more page, and all of the detail about my site has been removed, all Google contains anymore about my site is the address, no title, no extra quotes, or anything?

I am not sure what happened here, since other Blogger hosted sites are not having the same problem. I guess Google just doesn’t like me anymore.

posted by Jason 3:26 PM |

 
Another Missed Opportunity

On my way home last night I was driving along the freeway when I came upon a really slow driver in the left lane, that outright refused to move out of the way, so eventually I was forced to pass the person on the right, and as I went by I looked over to see what type of a person it was, you know, were they some old person that could barely see over the dashboard, that sort of thing. I was astonished to see that it was a very attractive young lady giving me the finger.

At first I felt kinda bad for just having ticked off someone I might have normally considered part of the dating pool.

But then I came to my senses, 1, it is unlikely she would remember me. Of course let’s let you make the decision, how likely is this to happen: (Picture a nice bar.)

Me: “Hey, (Insert cheesy pick-up line of your choice)”
Her: “Don’t I know you from somewhere?”
Me: “From your dreams baby.” (Feel free to substitute any other cheesy pickup line.)
Her: “Oh wait I do know you, you were the Jacka** from a couple of months ago that cut me off!” – Then throws drink in my face, and storms off.

And 2, what are the chances I could actually meet an attractive young lady that considers me to be “In the dating pool”?

posted by Jason 3:04 PM |

Monday, November 17, 2003

 
Being Trumped by the Payroll Lady

Apparently my boss (Head of Information Systems) has been replaced by . . . the Payroll Lady.

He attempted to call the Phone Company today to get a number removed from our account since we no longer use it, only to find out that he is not authorized to make changes to our phone service. So he asked who is, and it turns out that only the Payroll Lady is allowed to make changes to our phone service, so he had to go get her to re-authorize him as someone capable of making changes.

I am not sure how the phone company came to this conclusion, but non-the-less I found it rather humorous.

posted by Jason 4:26 PM |

 
How Stupid are We?

If you are going to steal from someone, only do it once.

If you are lucky enough to get away with it the first time, your chances of the second time are significantly reduced. And your chances become close to nill after that.

Why do some people think that no one notices when things go missing? Just because they didn’t tell the world about it the first time does not mean they haven’t noticed, and taken precautions to prevent it from happening in the future.

A company I used to work for in Seattle had some money disappear from a few registers a few weeks in a row, but it was always a different register, so we couldn’t pin it on a cashier. So we (the store manager and I) didn’t say anything about the missing money, we just setup a little security camera, and watched for a couple of days, and low and behold the person tried again and we caught them.

I have many other instances of this same thing, but you get the point.

I have heard that the place in the brain that determines how intelligent you are is the exact same place in your brain that gives you your belief in your own intelligence.

So I guess maybe the same portion of the brain that overrides your sense of right and wrong, is also the part that associates your perception with others’ ability to perceive.

posted by Jason 3:15 PM |

Friday, November 14, 2003

 
The Onion | Mom Finds Out About Blog

I don't think there would be a problem with that at this point.

Although I guess that means I don't write interesting enought topics.
posted by Jason 11:00 AM |

 
Who is trying to be me?

I keep getting e-mails from Blogger confirming that I want to change my password. I have received 5 of these over the last week or so. I am glad to know that this person isn’t actually able to force my password to be changed, but I am annoyed that someone is either thinking they are me, or trying to become me, and I don’t particularly want that.

This world can only survive on the fact that there can only ever be 1 of me.

posted by Jason 10:40 AM |

Wednesday, November 12, 2003

 
“The Resolution of Conflict is the Birth of Stagnation”

This is a quote I coined a few years ago when having a very interesting conversation with a friend of mine. We were discussing why we have never gone back to the moon in so long. I have also kept it in mind on a regular basis for everyday life. It comes up every time somebody at work insists on having a “Meeting” with our resident Communication Expert. I also think about it often when I hear of people whining about war, love, politics, and lots of other topics.

If you think about it why did we make it to the moon? We were at “War” with the USSR and we needed to prove we were superior. Why do we get so excited about sports games?

Conflict, spurs the imagination. It gives us a problem to solve and a sense of urgency in which to solve it. It gives us purpose. It is driven by significant personal motivation. Being on the loosing end of a conflict threatens one of the more driving personal motivations; self-worth, self confidence, or egotism whatever you want to call it. Loosing even the simplest of conflicts threatens your view of those attributes in a personal way, or broad way. So you are very motivated to be on the winning side. (At least in your mind.)

Without conflict there is no striving to be better. Without conflict why be better? Be better than what? Who?

Why did you graduate High School/College? To be better? Why? The simplest answer is “To be better than the next guy.” You may be thinking “I am not driven by such egotistical motivations.” Yes you are. That piece of paper you got makes you slightly better than they guy without it in the competition for a job.

Now I am not saying all conflicts are good or necessary, but I do believe conflict is necessary to progress. So the next time you think that a conflict needs to be resolved, or avoided, think about the positives that the conflict might be creating, and then make an informed decision.

Just because it is an argument doesn’t mean it should be avoided.

posted by Jason 4:12 PM |

Tuesday, November 11, 2003

 
Wash the Dog

WooHoo I have been looking forward to this day for quite a while now! I get to wash my dog today!

O.K. Sarcasm aside, it isn’t exactly an easy thing to keep a 70lb dog in a bathtub that he doesn’t want to be in. So my time after work is going to be all kinds of fun making a total mess of my front bathroom.

posted by Jason 4:15 PM |

Monday, November 10, 2003

 
To Fight or not to Fight?

I am faced with a choice that has me perplexed.

Backstory; Last Thursday Night I was pulled over by a State Patrol woman. (? I am not sure of the PC way to refer to her. Patrol person? Maybe.) Anyway, to make a long story short, she ticketed me for “Following Too Close.” Now I will concede to having followed too close to the person she ticketed me for, but I was following that close to encourage the person to move out of the left lane. I live in Oregon, where it is illegal to pass someone on the right, even if they are going below the speed limit, so what was I supposed to have done? I can’t honk at him because that is also against the law, I can’t flash my high beams at him, because I know I would have been pulled over for that as well. But the guy was going 57 in a 65 in the left lane, and there was no-one in the right lane.

So I am torn, 1 by my laziness, do I really want to spend the time in court to ask the judge that question. And 2 by the fact that I know I was following too close. I know that, thus I can’t go argue that I didn’t deserve the ticket. Then again, if I am presented with the same circumstances in the future what should be my decision?

posted by Jason 1:23 PM |

Friday, November 07, 2003

 
Telemarketing at its Greatest?

Ring . . . Ring . . . (No Caller-ID)

“Hello”

Recording - “ington Mutual, If you would be interested in this service Please give us a call at 1-866-8”. Click

Oh, now there was a really good computer generated Telemarketing call. I am pretty sure the recording started playing as soon as the phone rang, thus unless I was lightning fast on answering the call I would never actually hear the first sentence of that call. Not that I would have bought anything anyway. But now I am masochistically somewhat curious about what they where trying to sell me.

posted by Jason 2:42 PM |

 
Revolutions – Undecided

Well Last night I went to go see Matrix Revolutions. I am undecided on what I think of it. When I saw Reloaded I didn’t really care for it, until I saw it a second time, then I liked it. Maybe it will be the same with Revolutions.

Granted I did think that there where some very cool special effects in it, and the Dock scene was very cool. But it just . . . . I don’t know, I am very indecisive about it right now.

posted by Jason 1:24 PM |

Thursday, November 06, 2003

 
Can’t get a darn thing right

Ever had one of those day’s where your brain seems to be stuck in Neutral? Massild a friend of mine seems to be that way today. I sent him an e-mail and asked him a question, he replied back with what seemed like a logical answer, except that his answer was not related to my question, and later when he called me after expecting me to call him, he was very confused. When I explained my e-mail he caught on, but it was tough for a while there. After a few minutes he called back and informed me that pretty much all the other information in his e-mail was also wrong. We have been playing phone tag ever since between me, him, and his wife, trying to get everything worked out again.

All kinds of fun.

posted by Jason 2:48 PM |

Wednesday, November 05, 2003

 
Gold!

A computer game I have been waiting for since 1987 finally went Gold today! For those of you that don’t know what going Gold means (No I am not referring to an album that sold 4 billion copies) it means that the Master disc has been written, the single CD that all other copies of the game will be made from. This still means about a 2 week wait for the packaging, and manuals and shipping etc. to be completed. But it is good news in that the game, save an act of God, will not be delayed further.

Now this game hasn’t actually been in development since 1987, but that was about the last time I played the game that all other games of the space-sim genre have strived to come close to, and have all fallen flat on their faces. This game from every preview I have read, actually comes close and possibly even surpasses the original game Elite. So when X2 finally hits shelves in a couple of weeks, I will be buying it at some hugely inflated price just so I can start playing it.


Wow three updates in a single day, that's new.
posted by Jason 3:55 PM |

 
Marketers Working Overtime

I saw what I thought to be one of the funniest commercials of all time last week. I meant to write about it then, but I forgot about it until just now. I know that it is the job of marketing type people to come up with all sorts of ways to make their product look better to the masses, but I think this idea was cracked a little late one night, after way too many cups of coffee w/ Irish Cream.

I never thought I would live to see the day when KFC (Kentucky Fried Chicken) would be advertised as a Diet Food. That’s right; Original Style Fried chicken was being advertised as a great way to diet! Granted at the bottom of the screen in little text it said and I quote: “Not a Low Sodium, Low Cholesterol, or Low Fat food.”

But Still! KFC Original Chicken Diet food? I know there are about half a billion different diets out there right now, growing at an exponential rate, but I still couldn’t stop laughing at the idea. I can’t wait for the Coffee & Chocolate Diet to come out, because who could get fat off of being continuously hyper? Or even the FDA approved Crack diet, hop yourself up on Crack and you won’t be hungry anymore, thus you will loose weight! (Fine print: Not responsible for jail time, or loss of life.)

posted by Jason 3:07 PM |

 
Bad Driving Habits have crossed the line!

Now I have heard people complain about people eating while driving, or talking on the cell phone while driving. And I must admit I hate it when others do those things when they are in my way, but I also must admit to doing both myself. But there are just some things you should not do while driving, last year I saw a guy brushing his teeth, and have seen people reading novels while driving down the freeway, but this morning I caught someone doing something I never would have guessed at.

The Lady was trimming her bangs! She was looking in the vanity mirror on her sun visor, and using scissors to cut her hair while she was driving down the road. Not only was this bad for her ability to drive, but I can’t imagine it was good for the look of her hair in the end.

Friend: “Whoa, what happened to your hair?”
Stupid Driver: “I was trimming my bangs when I hit a pot hole, and sliced off half of my hair.”
Friend: “How did you hit a pot hole in your bathroom?”

posted by Jason 1:36 PM |

Monday, November 03, 2003

 
Halloween Success

Well the Halloween party at my house went over pretty well. The party was fun, and had a good turn out. We even where able to do a scavenger hunt, all of my neighbors where very supportive and helpful, which surprised me. I ended up tossing together a costume about 30 mins before people came over and it ended up turning out pretty good as well.

Next year I have to remember to buy candy before Halloween day. For when you buy it on Halloween you get stuck buying very expensive candy, because that’s all that’s left.

posted by Jason 2:58 PM |

Thursday, October 30, 2003

 
Costumes, Parties and Candy oh My

Well I am having a Halloween party at my house tomorrow night, but the creepy thing is that I am not having the party. In fact I think I am lucky in that I was invited. I have a friend that is really good at planning things, so she wanted to have a Halloween party, but didn’t have the space for it. So she asked if she could have her party at my house.

Well she made it a costume party, and I have still not come up with a costume I am willing to don this year. Last year I got away with wearing a robe and boxers all day, but I think I can only pull that off once.

Also since I haven’t had any money for the last few weeks I also still don’t have any candy for giving out to Trick-or-Treater’s this year. And since this is my first Halloween owning a house, I figure now is a good time to become known for giving out good candy.

So I have to come up with a costume for tomorrow, go buy candy for tomorrow, and clean my house so that people can actually come over.

posted by Jason 1:22 PM |

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

 
Locked Out from Locking the Door

Last Thursday I had a problem when I went to get into my car after work I found that I could not unlock my door. After some testing I found that I could jiggle the lock a bit and get the door to unlock. I needed to take my car down to get my Driver’s side chair fixed anyway since it is under recall for spontaneously reclining. (I have never experienced this problem.) But I haven’t taken it down yet. Well last night while jiggling the lock it went POP and then unlocked. Well as of this morning I can no longer lock my door. It won’t allow it. So now I really need to get my car down to the shop.

posted by Jason 1:47 PM |

Monday, October 27, 2003

 
Cardinal Rules

Every guy knows there are just certain cardinal rules you don’t break. Most guys know them even though they were never taught, or passed down from a parent. We just know them.

So why do some guy’s not know them? Do they actually know them and just ignore them, or do they really not know them. And if they don’t know them how do you teach them the rules? Especially when they are 50?

A guy here at work apparently does not know them, and it is really uncomfortable. Now everyone knows the “Don’t talk to me while I am pee’ing” but this one lots of guys ignore. And it is easily dismissed as just being rude or ignorant, instead of breaking a rule. On the other hand, “Do not touch me while I am pee’ing” is considered steadfast. Another rule, a slightly stiffer version of No Talking, is “Don’t talk to me while I am pee’ing, but especially if you are not pee’ing.” In other words don’t follow me into the bathroom to continue a conversation, and then just stand around talking to me, that is just creepy. This guy has broken both of these rules within the last 4 days and I am not quite sure how to handle the situation as a man.

Men don’t talk to each other about etiquette, and I surely am not going to bring up urination habits to some guy I barely work with.

So do I sign him up for the grade school class that they pull the boys aside and teach them all the boy stuff, at the same time they are teaching girls the technique of “If you are mad, never tell a him why, he should just know.” If that is the only option, could someone tell me where they offer this class?

posted by Jason 1:11 PM |

Friday, October 24, 2003

 
Gloating

So I got assigned a task from my boss about 2 weeks ago, and I was supposed to buy some stuff for this project. Well the only company that I could find on the internet to get what I wanted for fairly cheap was x10.

Now I don’t like this company. They have had some of the most obnoxious advertising since Old Navy, except all of their advertising was on the web, and you couldn’t just mute it like you could the Old Navy commercials. Anyway, I kept putting it off because their site looks like it was written by a 5 year old playing on daddy’s computer. And they resort to obvious underhanded advertising techniques. i.e. “Sale ends today 10/18/03!”, except the sale has been going for at least the last 2 weeks, and the date just keeps changing. I hate companies that prey on the unintelligent. So I kept putting it off, until my boss made me make the purchase, and I told him, “I just don’t like this company it gives me bad vibes.” But he made me buy the product anyway.

Well we finally got the product in and it is broken. But not only that they have no phone support, and not only that, but the day after we received the shipment the company filed for Chapter 11 Bankruptcy!

Now I hate to rub it in that I told you so, but . . . . “I Told you So!!!!”

posted by Jason 3:41 PM |

 
Here we come to Save the Day, Microsoft is on its Way!

A Couple of days ago I upgraded my work computer to the new Office 2003 suite. First impressions are that most all of the changes are cosmetic. But there are a few Pluses and a few minuses to the new gift from Microsoft.

First the pluses. The new Outlook is significantly faster, and the new interface is pretty slick. I would recommend the new outlook for those that use outlook in the first place. The new features really do make it a much better e-mail/personal scheduling program.

The Minuses are more personal complaints. The new Access has a few new features that are just plain annoying and they are there to give stupid people a sense of security, and make them think that Microsoft actually cares, and is trying to remedy the rampant virus problems their software has. I cannot open any of my Access files without having to answer three questions relating to “Unsafe Expressions.” All three say exactly the same thing but insist on making triply sure that I really, really, really want to open this file. What is stupid about it is that they didn’t stop anything. In fact the help about “Unsafe Expressions” actually tells you how to run “Unsafe Expressions” on computers that are blocking those commands. And it is not a hard process to do. Although the Help on how to turn off the “feature” that protects you refers to a menu that does not exist! At this point I cannot seem to turn the dang “Feature” off.

I will keep you updated as I come across other revelations about the New office product.

posted by Jason 2:57 PM |

Tuesday, October 21, 2003

 
Training Day

Today I have a new employee. I had an employee hired a week ago but he failed his drug test, so we had to go back to the interviews, and picked out the young man who started today. (He insists he will pass his drug test.) So today has been spent attempting to train him into my archaic ways. I guess I don’t document things very well since he keeps asking me “is there a process for this”, or “is that documented somewhere?” And I keep answering with a “No, or at least not that I know of.”

I don’t micromanage so I really hope this guy is good at self motivation, I really don’t want to have to baby-sit.

posted by Jason 1:21 PM |

Monday, October 20, 2003

 
College students look up to me!?

OK Not really, but I did just have an odd experience, well it’s not really odd except that it happened to me which makes it odd. I just had two college students from the local university, both studying for their CS Degree, come over to my place of work and interview me as someone from the real world of where they want to go.

Now normally I would not have thought of myself in this capacity, I would have thought someone older and wiser than myself. The problem is that I am that older wiser version of myself and I am no longer anywhere near college age anymore, so I am OLD!

The other creepy part is that I never completed college. I and school don’t get along very well, so I decided a while ago I would just use work experience to get to where I want to go. And for the most part it has worked for me. Anyway back to my post and out of the past, I just found the idea that College students interviewing me to get an idea of where they are going was a little odd.

posted by Jason 4:19 PM |

 
Elixir

This last Friday night, I was introduced to a new game (Well new to me) called Elixir.

This game is a type of card game that is very funny. I only played it once, and the experience was good. I think future games of it would be even better since I would then understand most of the rules better. I think the game would be good for playing between close friends, or even a good “get to know you” type of party game. I highly recommend this game if you like to get together with fiends and play board games. I will now give a brief rundown of the game:

You start with a specified number of points that you spend on spells, the spells range from 1 to 4 points. Level 4 requiring 4 ingredients to cast, level 3 requiring 3 and so on. Thus the higher the number the more difficult it is to get the cards needed to cast the spell. You then start the game, and the point is to cast all of your spells first, using the draw pile “Finds” to get ingredients and other sometimes helpful items. Most of the spells carry very humorous affects. Some examples, 1. You pick an opponent to cast the spell on, and they must then call you “Master” every time they talk to you. If they do not they must give up one of their finds. 2. Everyone at the table picks a Wizards name, and you all must refer to each other as that name for the rest of the game.

There are ways to counteract spell, and other special items available, and many many more different types of spells.

Overall it made for a very entertaining game experience.

posted by Jason 2:07 PM |

Thursday, October 16, 2003

 
Bank Error in your Favor!

Monopoly is not based on reality. If it were the card “Bank Error in your Favor” would read like the following:

Bank error in your favor, collect $200. And the next time you owe a large amount of money to somebody the bank will correct the error right afterward and debit your account $200.

In other words the bank made a billing error on my home loan, and I waited 2 months to see if the bank would notice, then I took advantage of the error. A month and a half later after I spent the money, the bank corrected the error and billed me. Now if they had noticed earlier there would not have been a problem, but No!

I think they have someone spying on me that informed them of the worst possible time to correct the error.

posted by Jason 1:58 PM |

Wednesday, October 15, 2003

 
Lack of Reception

So as I said yesterday I would touch on why we currently have no receptionist in our company.

My company has this creepy idea that “Flex”ing into other positions around the company can improve your value to the company by knowing more than 1 position. The problem is that it has become more of a “I can get free work out of another department’s employees by using a ‘Flex’ position.” Thus, here is what happens.

Say our order entry department needs some temporary help through our busiest season. So they announce a Flex position, anyone in the company can apply for this position, and can move into it without a change in pay. So our receptionist, wanting to make herself more useful, applies for the position. She is accepted and moves into that position for a few months. Now the department that employs the receptionist needs to fill that position so they announce a flex position. This could go on for many positions, but in the end we end up needing temporary help in the last location that nobody wants to flex into.

Well that happened to be the receptionist position this time, and we had a somewhat bright young lady apply for the position, where in reality she was wanting a completely different job in the company, but figured this was a good way to get a foot in the door. Well we didn’t end up hiring her for the position that she wanted, so the day she found out that the other position had been filled, she quit. That was the same day I found out I had to go to this seminar I went to Monday. So that was annoying, since the regular receptionist should have gone to it instead of me.

Now I have painted a negative look at this whole flexing thing during this post, and really that is my underlying feeling. Although right now it is hard to hold to that feeling when the temporary receptionist we hired this week is So-Dang-Hot!

posted by Jason 4:06 PM |

Tuesday, October 14, 2003

 
People who Talk in Theaters Annoy Me.

People who talk in seminars as though they where talking in a theater annoy me more.

Now I am not talking about the guy who sits there in the theater and talks to his girlfriend/wife about everything but the movie. I am talking about the guy that has to vocalize every thought they have about the movie as it occurs to them, even though they went to the movie by themselves, and no one is sitting anywhere near them.

“Ah, so it’s that guy that killed the woman.”
“Whhhooo that guy should be careful!”

Etc. Anyway, I was in a seminar yesterday learning about our phone system. Now normally this would have been the receptionist of the company going to this seminar, but currently our company is without a standard receptionist (although I will save that for a later story.) Soooo, I was in this seminar, and the guy sitting down a couple of chairs from me, is one of the afore-mentioned people. Every time the speaker asked a question, he answered. Even rhetorical questions, this sometimes confused the speaker into asking “What?” Thinking that the guy was talking to her, and that would prompt a “oh, nothing” from the man that could not shut up.

This went on throughout the day, and was excessively annoying. At least in the movie theater you can Shhhh the person and feel somewhat better, since then if they continue you can just mentally assign them as some derogatory name, and assume their parents never taught them any manners.

But what could I have done to silence this guy, aside from the desire to slice his throat with the side of a manila folder?

posted by Jason 4:43 PM |

Friday, October 10, 2003

 
Happy Birthday!

Yesterday was my sister’s and mom’s Birthday, so I thought I would say publicly Happy Birthday to them both. I am heading over to my mom’s house after work to have cake with them. Although due to “mis-forecasting” my finances I am currently worth a whole -$100. So Birthday gifts will have to wait until after my next payday.

posted by Jason 12:52 PM |

Thursday, October 09, 2003

 
Random Spam,

I just receive the most pointless SPAM message ever. I have received completely blank Spams before that where more productive than this one.

The Title was “See Young Hotties take it up the A**”

Now because I use Outlook and my preview pane opened up the message I was able to see that it was all text, I was intrigued since I figured it would be a giant, grossly under censored, picture of something I didn’t need on my monitor at work. But it was text, so I was masochistically interested in how a bunch of text was going to make me want to visit this sex site. To my surprise it wasn’t an add for a sex site at all, but rather for low mortgage rates!

OK, so which marketing genius came up with this?

My problem is, these are completely separate market groups. If you are looking for mortgage rates, in e-mail, 1 you are stupid, and 2 you are not likely going to be reading a message titled this way. And if you are looking for a good sex site, you might be excited by the title, and then excessively disappointed to find out there is no sex site.

So to recap, your actual target customer is never going to read the message, but you are going to tick off a completely separate market group and get no return.

What was that guy thinking?

posted by Jason 12:18 PM |

Wednesday, October 08, 2003

 
It’s a good thing I don’t hold grudges.

Or else I would have missed a free lunch today. I had a run in with a co-worker yesterday (I even posted about it), he had me pretty irritated for most of the afternoon. Although this morning when I came to work, I had gotten over my little tantrum, and had let the whole thing go. Well I was standing at the right place at the right time before lunch today, and got invited to lunch with someone else here. Well the co-worker I barked at yesterday was also invited.

Now for some that would have been awkward or they wouldn’t have been able to be civil with the person. But I did a pretty good job about not even being bothered by the previous day’s happenings.

posted by Jason 2:18 PM |

 
Ahh Dave Barry,

So not only is this guy really funny, but he also shares a remarkable number of my views on things. There are some things I am just really annoyed about and he puts them to words for me. Some of his best Columns (Or at least in my opinion) have been him bitching about something, and 99% of them I have agreed with. This weeks column realtes again to the Telemarketing issue and the Do-Not-Call list. He touched on it in a previous article and gave out the ATA’s phone number, at which so many people called that the ATA shut off the phone number, and then openly slammed Dave for not having warned them of the publishing of their number.

Well this time he did it again, and listed another number of the ATA’s.

I think Dave has found a new playmate, and should make for an interesting rivalry between a man, and a giant corporation that annoys everyone.

I personally hope this little competition goes on for a while; it is quite entertaining.

posted by Jason 2:13 PM |

Tuesday, October 07, 2003

 
Aaaarrrrrggggg!

Ever been in a perfectly good mood, and motivated to get stuff done, and some dork comes around and ticks you off for no good reason, and all that motivation to do anything just goes straight out the window?

Well that just happened to me, and now all I feel like doing is venting. Of course that means I am not getting any work done here now. And that is ticking me off more.

I was in a good mood, because our company agreed to let me donate 16 computers to a local High School, and I got to deliver them today, but now all of that is gone, and I am irritated.

Don’t these people know what I do around here for them? And then irritating me for something as piddly as having a box of mine in “Their” area for 7 days, when I gave them that area in the first place? Aaaarrrrrggggg!

posted by Jason 3:27 PM |

Monday, October 06, 2003

 
I LOVE this site

Escher's "Relativity" in LEGO

You should also check out their other LEGO renditions of Escher, they are all really good.
posted by Jason 4:23 PM |

 
Ah, the simple things.

It was a pure joy yesterday, to do ab . . . so . . . lute . . . ly nothing all day. I decided when my alarm went off, that there wasn’t anything I REALLY needed to do that day, so I shut of the alarm and went back to sleep, then woke up and laid there for another hour, and finally dragged my butt out of bed at 12:00. Ate breakfast (Is it still breakfast at noon? Even if you have cereal?), never combed my hair (or really even got dressed for that matter), watched some football, played computer games, watch some more TV, ate dinner around 9:00, watched a movie, then went to bed. It was a great day!

posted by Jason 4:14 PM |

Friday, October 03, 2003

 
Wow, talk about jumping the gun on that report.

CORRECTION (washingtonpost.com)
posted by Jason 1:56 PM |

Thursday, October 02, 2003

 
Ouch, That’s just wrong.

I have been reading since about noon, that Valve’s Half-Life 2’s source code has been leaked onto the internet. And I felt the need to voice my opinion on the topic, since I am a software engineer.

I have been reading people’s comments like “Why did he have the source code on his computer that was connected to the internet? Why didn’t he protect it better?” and stuff like that, but it is really easy to look back on the situation and point out all the things he could have done, but how many of you keep personal records on your computer? I will guarantee you that you don’t have nearly the security system running on your network/computer that Valve has running on theirs, yet you, and I still do it, why?

Is it because we are stupid? Is it we are uneducated? Well the answer may be both, but there are other reasons as well. Most of us took a good portion of the following into account.

1. Risk vs. cost/convenience. Now you may not have sat down and did all the figuring, but a version of it has passed through your mind. It may have even been unconscious, but you still did it. When you went down and bought, or decided not to buy that software/hardware firewall, unless you fall into that first question, you are aware that nothing is impenetrable. So buying that $50 firewall as opposed to the $3500 firewall we use here at work seemed like a good investment. Then again who owns a second computer specifically to do their finances? And who wants to? I like using 1 computer for everything, it is all setup the way I like, and if I change something it stays.
2. Motive vs random attack. What are the 3 dangers of the fire swamp? Flame spouts, Lightning sand, and ROUSes. Wait, no, that’s not it but close. There are the random attacks: i.e. Send out a non-targeted virus that installs a Trojan and see who runs it. Well we all know of this one anymore, and think we can avoid these pretty easily. i.e. don’t open e-mail we don’t trust. Direct attack, well who is going to attack my computer directly? As long as I am not out there on the internet spouting off about my millions of dollars, it is unlikely my computer’s address will draw enough attention to be directly attacked. And 3rd if I keep my stuff at least decently hidden/password protected who is going to spend the time getting to the few dollars that I might have available.
3. Ego/experience. The belief that “It will never happen to me.” Or it never has happened to me, so what’s the likelihood that it will in the future?
4. Someone you trust in “The Field” told you it was ok.

Between these things you have made the rationalization that it is ok to do. Well if anyone of you ever gets something taken, any one or all of those reasons above will fail you, and someone can point it out that you where foolish. Well Gabe at Valve, and his IT department definitely went through the same process, likely more formalized than the version you went through though. I have gone through the same thing here at work with my boss as well. We plug the holes we see as glaring, or we have had experience with in the past, and we try to learn from others experiences to be prepared for the future. They did the same thing, and I don’t fault them for that. The attack that took their source code, was specifically directed at them, and likely took a lot of planning, intelligence, and time to pull off. Plus was excessively risky for the culprits future, if they are caught it could mean a good deal of time behind bars. Who would have guessed that source code was that important to someone? Now we can say beyond doubt that it was that important, but then again that is looking into the past.

Anyway, I think it is a shame this has happened, and although I don’t think I will play Half-Life 2 (I am looking forward to Doom III myself), I am still very sorry to hear of this happening. That code took them a very long time to create, and now it isn’t worth much.

Take the last 5 or so years of your life, and undo it, and see how that makes you feel? That will then touch on what I am sure the guy’s over at Valve are feeling now.

posted by Jason 4:40 PM |

 
Now that is quite the topic.

Over at Dave Barry's Blog there is a current debate on the techniques used for male urination. Who would have guessed so many people would have such passion for their method, that they would be willing to argue for it in public.

I can't even beleive that Dave would be so un-tactful as to publish anything about male urination on his site!
posted by Jason 2:15 PM |

Wednesday, October 01, 2003

 
How Annoying

Our new Drug and Alcohol guidelines have just been released here at work, and the guidelines are 2 whole pages of statements like this:

“Specific articulable observation(s) relating to changes in work performance, appearance, behavior, speech, etc”

Why can’t the entire policy be this:

“If you are asked to perform a drug test at anytime, and you fail, or refuse to comply, you will be terminated. The Company can ask you to take a drug test for any reason, at any time.”

I think this would work well, and the whole “That is an invasion of my privacy” thing, is just ridiculous. If you are on company property, your doing drugs is not part of your private life any longer. I think that would be much simpler, and leave no room for interpretations. And I think would be more of a deterrent to take drugs at work, since then those on drugs would actually be able to understand the policy.

posted by Jason 4:50 PM |

 
Dang-It I can’t win

I am apparently no good at being nice. There have been times in the past, and one just a few minutes ago that have led me to this conclusion.

Someone asked me if I could change something for them. I didn’t want to, didn’t think it was a valid request, and actually felt as though the request was born out of a superiority complex, so needless to say I told him “no.”

Now I didn’t just say no. I know the person is rather high up on the food chain at work, so I tried to be as tactful, and polite as possible. I wrote a well worded e-mail, and proofread and edited it 4 times before sending it to him. I took out any sentences that I thought might have had a negative undertone, and added more logical explanations as to why I was unable to fulfill his request. I also CC’d my boss so he was apprised of the situation just in case someone else brought him in

I have not heard back from him, but in an effort to be helpful, my boss sent me a reply stating the following and I quote “I think this e-mail is just going to piss him off.”

Dang-It that is why I proofread it, to make sure that wasn’t the case! I think I need an interpreter, I will tell them “Tell so-and-so ‘no’, just because they think their so F’n special does not mean everyone else does.” And they will interpret that and tell so-and-so “no” in a much more polite way, that I can’t think of because like I said, I am no good at that.

posted by Jason 4:31 PM |

 
Now this is a set of practical jokes I can appreciate!

BBC NEWS | UK | Car stunt shocks newlyweds
posted by Jason 12:54 PM |

 
It Has Been so Long.

It has been quite a while since the last time I was able to sit around at home and do nothing but play video games. It has been a friend severely neglected lately, and I think it is time we get re-acquainted. The last two nights in a row I have spent no less than 4 hours a night playing video games, and it has been a tremendous stress relief.

I want to know where the scientific tests, and studies, are that test weather or not stress is decreased in people who regularly play video games, compared to those that do not. I bet the overall stress level of people who play is significantly lower than those that do not. The only problem I see in this is that if I get involved in the game I am currently playing, and it takes me a few weeks to get bored of it, I am likely to get sucked right back in when This game is released. I have been looking forward to this game for a very long time, and I miss the old days of playing Elite on my Commodore 64, hopefully X2 will be the game that appeases that desire of mine.

posted by Jason 12:45 PM |

Tuesday, September 30, 2003

 
Wait a Tic?!

I just thought of something while posting that last update. Take the two following articles both based on lawsuits/laws. RIAA Here, and Telemarketing Here. Here are the quotes I am specifically looking at:

From the Telemarketing case: "’Fifty million Americans can't be wrong,’ U.S. Rep. Billy Tauzin, R-Louisiana, said Wednesday”

From RIAA: “62 million Americans who participate in file-sharing networks“

So to recap, 50 million Americans can’t be wrong, but 62 million Americans are criminals. I think the Telemarketing companies aren’t paying off their elected officials anymore.

posted by Jason 1:04 PM |

 
The RIAA Is really smart

From the following article.
CNN.com - Music group settles with 52 file sharers - Sep. 30, 2003

"The RIAA also said 863 people have requested amnesty from future lawsuits, in exchange for a formal admission they illegally shared music and a pledge to delete the songs off their computers."

"...there are roughly 62 million Americans who participate in file-sharing networks. He called those seeking amnesty a small ratio of total users. "

A Small Ratio?!? "SMALL???" That works out to 0.0014%! I don't think I would have used the word small. Minute, itsy-bitsy, miniscule, so insignificantly tiny it's not worth mentioning. Those are ways I would describe that number.

posted by Jason 12:46 PM |

 
Whew, that was Close.

This morning I had to tell the president, and vice pres, of my company that we likely lost all faxed orders that came in over the weekend. I then had to tell them that there isn’t really anything we can do to help prevent the problem from possibly re-occurring in the future.

Then we had a minor phone system problem, so I called our service provider, and he said, “Try rebooting.”

So I did, and then nothing, the whole phone system went down, and never came back up! I went into panic mode, thinking I was going to have to tell the president that I have now broke his phone system as well. Mental pictures of my head being placed in a guillotine flashed across my mind as I waited on hold for the technician that told me to reboot.

But all was well, for some strange reason it didn’t like the first reboot, but a second one seems to have fixed both problems, and the phone system was down for only about 5 minutes. It appears I will be able to keep my head for another day at least.

posted by Jason 11:50 AM |

Monday, September 29, 2003

 
The Negative energy is visible around here anymore.

I am in IS (Information Services), thus I am invisible. Not like invisible, no one sees me or knows I am here boohoo for me. More like I walk into a room at work, and no one stops talking. This could include the HR manager and an employee with severe personal problems talking about what to do now. I walk in to fix a computer or some-such, and they continue talking away as though I wasn’t there. Normally I just disregard the conversation I hear, or leisurely pay attention just to catch the mood. This works well for knowing the most about any given department than anyone else in the company. The problem is recently, all I am hearing is everyone bashing on other departments, or how bad management is running this company into the ground.

Now I have been at this company for over 3 years, and have been in other companies in the past, so I am no stranger to the office gossip and the ranting over other departments, and always about bad management. But recently here the ranting has picked up at an astounding rate. At this rate the top of the graph will make it to the moon, before Europe’s new satellite does. I am not sure what has caused this gigantic swing towards the negative, but I am bound and determined to find it. Right after I play my computer game tonight.

posted by Jason 5:02 PM |

 
Damn Social Life!

I never would have thought “I” would be saying that ever. You see if you haven’t already guessed I am kind of a geek. Although not in the cool sense of the word that seems to have come about since the start of the internet boom. No I am just a geek, nerd or dork, which ever you prefer. I always have been and likely always will be. Anyway, I just picked up a new RPG computer game this weekend, and wanted to play it. Well, apparently since the last time I played computer games, I have developed a slight tinge of a life, and dang-it it gets in the way.

I had my plans all laid out. I was to buy the game on Saturday, install it, and do some house cleaning/dishes (I do dishes usually once a week, and Saturday seems to usually be that day due to necessity.) Saturday night, and Sunday would then be free to waste all kinds of time doing nothing but drinking Mt. Dew, and playing games. But No, my “friends” wanted to come over and play games and watch movies, so I said that would be fine, assuming I would be able to play the next day, but then Sunday rolls around and these so called “friends” come over again to watch football. Then football ends and they don’t leave! More “friends” come over and we play some board games, they finally left around 10:00 and then I had to go to bed due to going to work this morning.

In reality I had a really good weekend, in fact it was definitely better than had I sat at home by myself and played computer games, but it ruined my plans! And now at work all I can think about is, “Tonight I should finally be able to play this game, I bet it is really, really good.”

posted by Jason 2:55 PM |

Friday, September 26, 2003

 
Only men are good at Volleyball Apparently (Rant Warning)

So I joined an amateur city league for volleyball, and last night was the first game we played, and my last.

I am not sure what prompted all of these rules, but personally I find them sexist, and stupid. I understand where the concept came from for the rules, but implementation was very poor. Some or most of these rules are not that bad unto themselves, but added together with the rest, make a bleak representation of the capability of women playing volleyball. Here are the rules I had a problem with even being a guy, and think most women should to.

1. You cannot play a game with 4 guys and only 2 girls, although 4 girls and 2 guys is acceptable.
2. If the ball is hit more than once on your side of the court, a girl must have touched it. (i.e. a guy stops a spike, and it almost makes it over the net, but needs a little help, it cannot be a guy to help it.) Although 3 girls can touch it without a single guy touching it, and no penalty is given.
3. If a girl serves and it hits the net, but does go over it, the serve is good, and playable, if a guy serves and it hits the net, then goes over, the ball is considered a bad serve and the other team takes possession.
4. At no time can there be 3 guys closer to the net than a girl, even in the middle of playing, while people are moving around to save the ball from hitting the ground.

For an amateur team, this is a lot to keep in mind, when your team has a problem getting the ball over the net anyway (No malice intended toward any of my teammates.) So I told the friends I had joined with that I wasn’t going to play anymore, since I did not have fun playing.

I want to have FUN while PLAYING a GAME, and if I can’t then I don’t see the point in PLAYING.

posted by Jason 11:21 AM |

 
And the ball is in . . . . I Have no idea

CNN.com - Do-not-call registry faces tougher challenge - Sep. 26, 2003

Quote "The registry creates a burden on one type of speech based solely on its content, without a logical, coherent privacy-based or prevention-of-abuse-based reason supporting the disparate treatment of different categories of speech," Nottingham ruled.

Whaaaaa?!?! What the hell is that supposed to mean?
posted by Jason 10:58 AM |

Thursday, September 25, 2003

 
Yeah again!

CNN.com - House votes for do-not-call registry - Sep. 25, 2003

Does anyone else feel like they are watching a tenis game or something?
posted by Jason 1:41 PM |

 
Rude awakening

I own a 70 Lbs Alaskan Malamute, I love him dearly, but he has got to find a better way of letting me know he has to go to the bathroom early in the morning.

This morning I was awoken to a sneeze right in my face, from about 1 ½ inches away. See my dog doesn’t bark very much so he doesn’t make noise to let me know things very often, instead he had gotten used to waking me up by getting his nose an inch or so from mine, and then breathing on me until I wake up from the hot humid air, then he runs out of the room as soon as I open my eyes. This means, he has to go.

My guess is this morning, he had been breathing on me for a while and I hadn’t woke up yet, when he needed to sneeze he did so. It just so happens he was still very close to my face at the time. (Boy am I glad I didn’t have mouth open drooling at the time, or I wouldn’t have been able to tell his slobber from my own.)

posted by Jason 1:02 PM |

Wednesday, September 24, 2003

 
Go Figure

U.S. court blocks anti-telemarketing list - Sep. 24, 2003

Not that I get any telemarketing calls anyway, but it was a good idea for a little while.
posted by Jason 3:52 PM |

 
And Now the D%&*% Blogger doesn't work!

Toss another log on the fire of the day.
posted by Jason 3:21 PM |

 
Psssss BOOM!

I have a rather short fuse today and I am unsure as to why. Male PMS???? I don’t think so, and if you mention it again I will ram it down your throat!

Ummm, Sorry. So far today I have snapped at 2 different people for things that weren’t even their fault, and I have practically growled at anyone that so much as opens my office door. I also told someone that there was no way the problem they were experiencing was caused by my systems, and then realized that I was wrong.

I slept well last night, and it’s not a full moon or anything? I guess it will just be one of those mystery things. Although I hope it goes away by tomorrow, since important things are happening then that I don’t want to be in a bad mood for.

posted by Jason 3:21 PM |

Tuesday, September 23, 2003

 
Read This Post!

I was heading off for lunch this afternoon, and once again I am a little low on gas. When my Explorer gets low on gas, has a low battery charge, or the engine is about to blow up a little light pops on that says, and I am not kidding, “Check Gauge”. The first question is always “Which Gauge?” Then the reality sinks in that you are already looking at all the gauges, it’s not like “Check Gauge” means to stop the vehicle, pop the hood, and check the thermometer attached to the side of the engine block, No it means “look at your stupid gauges you idiot!” This seems rather superfluous to me, but it gave me an idea.

I am always rather annoyed at all the stupid and idiotic lawsuits going on in my country (USA in case you didn’t know.) And before I have always thought I was annoyed because they are eating up our court’s time with dumb things, like “McDonalds made me Fat!” Although now I have realized I am annoyed because these idiots might actually make money off of something so simple and stooped, and all it cost was a little bit of dignity, by publicly admitting “I am a sheep and cannot think for myself.” Why didn’t I think of that, well now I have.

I am going to sue all consumer products on the market right now, that have warning labels. I am suing them because they did not specifically tell me to “Read This Warning!”

Now you may be thinking that is a stretch, but hear me out. The light probably came about by 1 of the following 2 methods. Someone tried to sue Ford for not informing them that 1 of the gauges was informing them that something bad was about to happen, and then it did so it was obviously Ford’s fault, and this was Ford’s way of remedying that problem from happening in the future. Or, an engineer decided that just looking at a gauge sitting below the ‘E’ was not enough information for the average consumer to realize that action needed to be taken.

In either case consumers are apparently not as smart as they should be, so I feel that telling people to read the warning, is what is required to help educate the consumer to better handle these sorts of situations. (After all I am only concerned for the mass’s well being, and definitely not my own popularity, or wealth.)

posted by Jason 12:52 PM |

 
If I work 1 more minute on this project, my Brain will implode!

For the last few weeks at work I have been working frantically on a project who’s due date was yesterday (literally). Needless to say, I did not finish it, but I am still trying to salvage a minute sense of timeliness by getting it done at least in the same week that it is due. (As opposed to previous projects completed within the same year they are due.)

Now I have had large projects before, but this one is a little different. First, this project has been on the schedule all year, and was originally scheduled for completion on July 1. (See I told you, we try to complete things in the same year as their due dates.) Anyway through lots of re-prioritizations, lack of synergy, and too much thinking outside the box, the schedule got pushed back, then about a month ago this project became the managers sole purpose for living, thus I have been working like a mad man since to complete a 3 month project in 3 weeks. I am almost done but this morning my brain has stopped cooperating with me, and I can no longer even type correctly. (As I am typing this in Word the entire document looks like Christmas puked all over it with little red and green squigglies all over the place. I will fix most of them before I post though so please no looking for all of my mistakes.)

Although on the bright side, when I am done I will be able to claim on my resume that I have had a brain transplant.

posted by Jason 11:24 AM |

Monday, September 22, 2003

 
I am not gay after all

While installing my curtains last week, I had installed them wrong, due to bad measuring, so I had to re-hang them this weekend. Well I have proven I am a guy, and not gay.

I was unable to complete a home repair without losing, destroying, or forgetting at least 1 necessary component of the repair, thus requiring me to make at least 1 extra trip to the hardware store. And since no MAN can complete a repair without more than 1 trip to the hardware store, I take this as conclusive evidence that my house did not after all make me gay.

posted by Jason 1:59 PM |

Friday, September 19, 2003

 
Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Arrr, ye matties, scurvy dogs, and pretty lasses, today be thee grand ole’ talk like a pirate day!
posted by Jason 9:05 AM |

Thursday, September 18, 2003

 
Anyone got a few million Dollars?

I have the best, sure fireway to be guaranteed to make 1000% more.

Just give me the money, and I will light it on fire. Or you could invest in this guy.

[H]ard|OCP - Behind the Infinium Phantom Console

But I would recomend the first option.

posted by Jason 3:18 PM |

 
I really need to stop going to this Taco Hell.

For lunch today I and a friend decided to hit the good ole Taco Hell. When we made it up to the Drive-up menu, a hand written sign say’s “Please Say ‘Hello’.” Not instilling confidence in this particular restaurant, once again. (I have had previous bad experiences with this location.) So anyway, after saying ‘Hello’ I was greeted by a young man asking me what I would like. I made my order, and then my friend made his order. Except he had had asked for Mexi-Nuggets instead of the taco a change to 1 of the meal options, and then a young woman came on and stated, that wasn’t an option, so we discussed it and decided to go with the soft version of the taco offered, and a Pepsi. Then a completely different person came on and asked if that was all. We stated yes, both with confused looks on our faces.

So we drive up to the window, and a young man (Probably the first person we talked to.) took my money, handed me my drink, and closed the window. After a while he came back and asked:

“Did you order a drink with your meal combo?” . . . .
“Yes, we did, we ordered a Pepsi” . . . . .
“Oh, OK hold on”

And he headed back in to get the Pepsi, handed it to us, and closed the window again, to which I asked my friend, “so how screwed-up do you think this order will be?” His response: “I won’t even guess.” By the way, we didn’t even see a young lady working in the Taco Hell from our vantage point.

So after a while we got the food, and drove away. I was surprised that my order was completely correct! My friend’s was almost, except no Soft Taco, just a hard one.

The Story I make up is that the young lady didn’t actually work for Taco Hell, and was just a customer they handed the microphone to and said, “Here you tell them they can’t have what they want. And feel free to ignore anything they say after that.”

posted by Jason 3:15 PM |

Wednesday, September 17, 2003

 
What disappointment

So I just found out that my grade school principal has read my blog. She had nice comments about it, but that is not the point. As I have now been thinking today about what I was like back then. . . . .

Frequent visits to the principal’s office, constantly getting in trouble for fidgeting, being grounded on a regular basis for screwing off, or doing something I wasn’t supposed to, getting beat-up for being a nerd. Dang I miss those days. . . .

Oh Wait, No I don’t! Although I think about what I would have thought of myself now, from when I was that age. ???(I don’t understand that sentence either.) Anyway I think you get my point. I am pretty sure I am somewhat of a disappointment to what I would have wanted back then. I don’t break very many rules, and I agree with almost all of my parents disciplinary methods. In fact I agree with them so much, I am pretty sure I would have grounded myself for years straight if I had been my parents, back then. Hopefully by the time I have a kid of my own (..shudder..) I will be more forgiving.

And generally as proud as I am of what I have become, for today I will reflect on what I would have become, if all of my aspirations from fourth grade had come true. . . . .

OK Enough of that!

posted by Jason 4:45 PM |

 
Dear RIAA

It has been brought to my attention that in making my comment yesterday about the RIAA I may have implicated myself in some illegal act, if they aren’t already investigating me, that would draw unwanted attention. If that is the case, I would like to make the following public statement directed to the RIAA.

“I don’t share my music!”

It took me painstaking countless hours over many, many years to collect my enormous collection of digital music (err, to convert my already owned collection into digital form). Why would I share it for free?

. . . . . .

I am sure I could get money out of it somehow.

posted by Jason 1:49 PM |

 
The Grinch who stole Christmas.

That is what I have become.

There are a few things that bother me about the way people use e-mail. I won’t even go into forwards during this post, but things like backgrounds, and Smiley faces, and stuff like that. Well anyway, I had someone from my church just ask me where to get the Office CD from so she could install more stationary for e-mails. So when I wrote back I wrote my objections to stationary in the e-mail and then informed her of where to get the disc (the real location not a smart-ass comment about “Where” she could get the disc.)

She wrote back and said . . . I quote. “I will remove my stationary immediately.” Now I feel like the Grinch. I am happy that this trend is stopping, but I also feel kinda bad for having stolen all the joy out of her e-mails for something that is more likely just a pet-peeve of mine.

So I am sorry, for steeling your joy in this matter. And I promise to not even mention my pet-peeves for cutesy mouse pointers, holiday screensavers, and hot-pink borders on Windows.

posted by Jason 10:07 AM |

Tuesday, September 16, 2003

 
All those hours of Game playing Just saved my Life!

I had what I am assuming is a government agent (No Doubt working for the RIAA.) just try and take me out! I was innocently on my way back from lunch when a black car up the road from me, pulled off into the shoulder, and waited for the car in front of me to pass, and then just as I was approaching, they jetted out into the road in what looked like an attempted U-Turn. My Honed driving skills, perfected by countless hours of “Need for Speed” and “Star Wars Pod Racer”, allowed me to swiftly swerve, and just barely squeeze by. Had I not re-acted so swiftly and perfectly, the “Agent” would have actually run into the side of my car at a full lunge. And since I likely would have been turning to avoid him, but still going 40, my SUV would have likely rolled over crushing me to death!

Ok so the guy was really just a dork that wasn’t paying attention, and I probably wasn’t in any real danger of bodily injury. But I like my version better.

posted by Jason 1:21 PM |

 
Plug the Dam, the flood is coming!

Never mind too late.

I have made the foul, above all fouls, for someone in the IT industry. I have given what should not have been given, and I gave it in too much quantity all at once, and now am going to pay the price for the rest of eternity.

For those that want to know what I am talking about, I shall give you a brief back-story.

It started earlier this year, when I was approached by my church to handle their computer and network support. I weighed this greatly in my mind, and decided hey, I wanted to be more involved in the church and here is a way to utilize my skills to help out. (Ok so there might have been a little bit of “No one else could do as good of a job as me.”, and yes, in case you are wondering I am working on the pride thing.) So . . . anyway, I took the job. It started out pretty simple. They wanted a few new computers, and a network. OK after some planning and ordering, a few months later, whalla! It was so.

One of the other requests was internet access. Here is where I have gotten my-self in trouble. I set them up with a Cable modem and set them free about the internet. (Please accept this as my formal appology to the rest of the internet. ;) )

Well up to this point I have had a few calls saying one-thing or another isn’t working right, and I would meander over there and fix it. Well last night I setup their e-mail system and gave them all a brief training on how to use it.

That was my blunder, that I shall ever repay.

So far, in the span of a few hours I have already gotten 6 e-mails stating problems and issues with all kinds of things, no wait make that 7. I fear the coming weeks will be rife with e-mail reply-ing and frequent trips down to the church after I get off work.

Oh well live and learn right. (You would think after this many years doing this business I would have already learned though.)

(And for anyone at the church that might read this. I have enjoyed working with you all on this and I am not complaining in anyway about you, or my decision to help you guy’s. Keep the e-mails coming, and I will do my best to get the problems worked out as quickly as possible.)
posted by Jason 12:34 PM |

 
I need a kid.

OK, so the few of you who know me just shuddered at the thought of that. And I am not saying I need a kid of my own. I just need one to do all those chores my parents used to make me do when I was a child. I spent most of this weekend doing chores around my house. I vacuumed, dusted, washed dishes, cleaned the bathrooms, raked leaves, and cleaned out the gutters. As I recall all of those except maybe the last one were things that us kids did, not my parents. So I have decided I just need a kid I can assign chores to (of course without paying.)

posted by Jason 11:26 AM |

Friday, September 12, 2003

 
My House has made me Gay.

So I have owned my house for a few months now, and I have just now gotten around to buying curtains for my Living Room (before I used a white sheet thumb tacked into the wall to cover the window.) I originally went to pick these out with Massild and his wife, but when I went down to purchase them I was alone. This was almost a disaster.

For one, all I had done was pick out the curtains, not the few hundred other things I needed to actually put the curtains up in my house. So now all by myself I had to explain to this poor lady what I wanted without knowing anything about what I was talking about. Example:

Me: “I also need one of those things to hold up the clearish, whitish, thingy that goes between the curtain and the window.”
Her: “Are you talking about a Sheer?”
Me: “Uh, is that a clearish, whitish, thingy that goes between the curtains and the window?”
Her: “I am not sure, I think so”
Me: “Ok then we will go with that.”

So to make a long story short, I had to learn a whole bunch of new terms, like Sheer and Valance, and Skirt in order to actually take home what I needed. I thought this was going to be “Hi, I need some Curtains for my Home, I like those.”

Anyway, why my house has made me gay. I got the curtains installed last night (Wrong, but installed) and today at work, I have been all happy about actually having a somewhat complete home. So a few people have asked me about them, and when I mention “I installed the curtains last night, but I need to re-hang them because I measured the height of the sheer wrong.” They look at me kinda funny, and all I can think is, “The last time I used the word Sheer I used it in reference to seeing through some girls clothes.”

posted by Jason 3:33 PM |

 
Skype!

I have run accross this new software/Instant messenger/VoiP program called Skype. This is a handy program by the makers of Kazaa. The program is an instant messenger, and a p2p phone system. I downloaded it and had my good friend Massild install it on his computer, and we tested it today. There are definetly some bugs for them to work out still but the first call we had went very smoothly for the first 10 minutes. The delay was less than my cell phone, and the audio quality was better too.

Anyway, since you can instant message and talk at the same time, the conversations went very weird. For a while I was typing to his wife, and talking with him, and then he took back over the keyboard, and the typing morphed into a MST3K version of the conversation. You know those things you think would be really funny to say, but the other person is still talking, and you don't want to interupt them? Well type it to them, and listen for them to bust out laughing in the middle of their speach as they read what you typed. It was all very ammusing. I highly recomend at least trying this software out, if you have friends.

www.skype.com
posted by Jason 3:00 PM |

Thursday, March 06, 2003

 
New Home.

Well I found me a house to buy. I have been looking actively for the last few months to try and find a home to buy and move into so that I am not renting any more. I finally found such a place, and the current owners accepted my offer, and I am now going through the process of getting everything settled, so I might be able to move in this month. The new place is much bigger than my current location, by about 700 SqFt. 3 bedroom 2 bath, all mine.

When I started looking for a place I wasn’t looking for such a huge place for myself, but after talking to a real-estate agent, I was informed nothing less than 3 bedroom homes sell very often, so look for 3 bedrooms or greater. “Gee I wonder why 2 bedrooms don’t sell.” Here is a completely hypothetical situation:

“Hi I am looking for a two bedroom house to buy.”
“No you’re not, you are looking for a 3 bedroom home.”
“No a 2 Bedroom, I am a single guy, moving out of a Studio apartment, have no furniture, family, or pets, a two bedroom will do fine.”
“Ok, I got it, a 3 bedroom 2 bath home. Ok I’ll give you a call when something comes up.”
...

posted by Jason 4:59 PM |

 
New direction.

OK I know the old site stopped getting updated for a while there, but I am hopefully back up and opperating.
posted by Jason 4:46 PM |